Once upon a day I lost my mind and my head was in my hands. The world was a blur, spinning around as I fade in and out, all alone with just me inside sorting through the mess inside.
I was struggling through the fight to keep control, like a worm from a bird (that’s right skipper) Finding focus here and there, my head was spinning like the earth around the sun, making moves and losing steps.
I was thinking: I could use some meds, would it be the answer to it all? Then finding focus in my faith, changing the world because that’s the game and you play the game; you lose your face. It just starts to wander, you then get dazed. Looking for something that’s missing, constantly waiting worried of taking the jump, but forgetting to land.
On a daily basis, you see the faces. The ones that pass you by, wondering what’s inside, what’s behind the facade? I’m walking alone down a trail that’s different, its not paved, there’s no signs or dotted lines. I take a hike off for a while, but I just come back from the wide. My shadow trails behind, sometimes forgetting to follow, and instead I follow what’s been dragging me down.
It’s something different not wanting to know how you feel about life, because you’re afraid of what you’d find. That’s kind of the position I’m in now. I’ve been struggling with a mixed bag and I don’t really feel like sorting it all out. So I just keep adding things. I’ve been asking myself a question: am I who I want to be? I don’ know. Some questions are better left unanswered.
